Well, despite the tears and frustration, despite moving out only to move back in again, despite the mountains of assignments and deadlines, and despite the fact that there are still exams to come, I’ve done it. I’ve completed a full semester at university. I’m as surprised as you are.
I can’t quite believe I’m here. I don’t know how I did it. I don’t know how, 20 chunky assignments submitted and two exams to go, I’m still going.
Actually, I do – it’s a mixture of mental breakdowns, pink smarties and retail therapy.
So let’s review.
I moved out, and into a room with a view. It wasn’t meant to be, but it was nice for a while.
But I started nonetheless, and that’s what counts. I’m learning new things, and not always failing. I’m learning a lot about myself too.
I survived four rounds of auditions. I didn’t get into any of the things I auditioned for, but I did the auditions – something that as a musician I should be more than familiar with, but actually had never auditioned for anything (apart from university itself) until that point.
I joined two new ensembles, and have since learnt about the two different cultures behind them. Gamelan and Lanyi are nothing like I’ve ever experienced before, but I feel like a better person for having experienced them.
I started an official work experience placement in a high school, and honestly it’s been so reassuring knowing that, even when I’m regularly dealing with kids who aren’t always the best behaved, I still want to teach and I’m still loving it. When the students thank me at the end of the lesson for helping them with their work, I feel as if I’m on cloud nine. There’s nothing like it, and I can’t wait until I’m teaching properly.
I even joined the netball team, which is a phrase I never thought I’d say. I’m the least sporty person I know – I’m pretty sure that the only time I’ve ever been seen exercising is on the occasional run to the bus when my time management goes out the window. But I’m on the netball team for the music department. 9am training sessions on a Friday are tough, but even our team captain has said I’m improving. I may have only played one match, but I’ve never missed a training session, and we’re even getting official kit next semester.
The assignments are hard, and I’ve discovered that all the major deadlines seem to just appear out of nowhere and bite me in the ass, mostly because there will always be several of them at the same time. But clearly this additional pressure is doing something good in my brain, because I have yet to fail an assignment. There’s a whole lot of emphasis on that “yet” though.
I’ve ticked so many things off my list already. Out of the twelve things on my original uni goals list, I can say that I feel like I’ve successfully completed about six of them. For only 11 weeks, that feels pretty damn good to me.
I’ve made new friends.
And reunited with old ones.
I miss high school more than anything, that hasn’t changed. But, as it turns out, I’m having a pretty good time in uni too.